Why is happiness so hard to achieve sometimes? It's something that's usually dancing right in front of our eyes and we just seem unable to catch it. Sometimes we live it and, in a blink, it's just not there anymore. Sometimes we think we're retaining it and we're just wasting it away. Why do we do that? Why do we, human beings that fight so hard for the so called happiness, act so devotedly to lose it when it's right in front of us?
Happiness should be easy. It actually is about just living those little special moments at the moment they occur, when they're dancing right in front of us. Just live it, not worrying about how it's gonna be in the future, or why it wasn't different in the past... it's not even about understanding how we were touched by that happy moment... it's just about living it. Every time we worry about being unhappy we act in a way that brings unhappiness to us, that scares away that person or that event that is the reason why we're currently happy. So... it gets me thinking: are we really afraid of not being happy some day, or is it happiness that really scares us?
My guess is that we were never taught to be happy. We were taught to be ambicious, we were taught to look for more, we were taught to be good wives, we were taught to be good parents, but we've never been taught to surrender to every happy moment we live, for it being as unique as it actually is!
Sounds like poetry, I know, but it's not poetry, I'm not a poet, I don't think I could ever be one. I'm just an observer, of my life and others', and that always gets me thinking, questioning... I'm a questioner, not a poet. I see very often people who have happy things in their lives wasting them away for reasons not even they understand. They just waste it! And then they regret it! Why do they do that? They don't know why they act like that, but they plant a life of regrets ahead of them, missing those things they had, living every minute either in the "what if I had...?" or in the "how could it have been if... ?", when the only place they had to be not to lose that moment was in the very present, because this is the only place we have for real.
Happiness doesn't have a formula, or a manual. It's also not a place. There are no steps you should follow to get there. Happiness can be many things! Today my little girl woke me up with her arms wide open, a huge smile on her face, and a very nice hug, covering me with kisses, and that was happiness to me. The rest of the day just sucked, but everytime I remembered that moment, I was happy. What is happiness for each of us?
I believe happiness is getting to know yourself, knowing your flaws and your strengths, so you don't become your number one enemy, sabotaging every little good thing you have in your life. Yes, the path to get to know yourself is large and hard. Living in ignorance is easier. But nothing is more rewarding than knowing who you are and why you act the way you act, so you can intervene! It's a hard but a rewarding path.
We might also help our way to happiness if we could stop looking for higher goals. Not resignation, but we should be able to be happy about the things we already have in spite of the things we haven't accomplished yet. We can keep on working on those things, but it doesn't mean we cannot enjoy the ride and be happy in the meantime.
Happiness to me is also being with my friends. I cherish every little moment with them. They're the family I've chosen, they make my life complete! I love them, and I'm very happy when they are around.
I'm no one to teach anyone any paths to happiness, but I'm someone who have lived a while - hopefully I still have a lot to live - and have learned some lessons. The most important one I've learned is that living happily could be a lot easier than we think. I've been happy many times. Some of these moments I blew because of me and my useless worries about things that were out of my control, some others were lost for some reason I was never able to completely understand. But I've never stopped looking for a higher understanding of this mechanism that goes on in front of our eyes, quietly, and makes us hostages of a destiny we're supposed to create every minute.
How have you been creating your life and future? I believe we build the lives we want to live, in spite of the circumstances, and according to them. I believe in compromise, I don't believe in resignation. I believe in sharing experiences, and learning from the experience of others... and as a proof of what I believe, here is my blog, where I will share my good and bad experiences throughout life. Hope we can help each other getting to a better place.
See you around!
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